Here's a movie tip for you: the Expendables--see this movie only if you relish the thought of red-hot ice picks slowly penetrating your retinal tissue while simultaneously having your medula oblangata crudely severed from your brain stem. This thing was the most awful piece of drek I've ever seen. And I'm keeping it nice, cause this is a family show.
There are more over the hill, has-been heavyweights here than in the palsy ward for retired boxers at the Mayo Clinic. As this bloated carcass plodded on, my wife complained of the gratuitous body count and carnage. "Hell, sweetheart, body count's not the problem," I said. "The Die Hard franchise left more bodies and carnage than a Hatian earthquake, yet it was watchable." The problem as I see it is first, Stallone and Rourke should sue their plastic surgeons-- pronto. These guys make Joan Rivers look like a an innocent, apple-cheeked farm girl of sixteen. Stallone's visage is pained with a sour look that screams acid reflux, and his expressions throughout the movie resemble more a petulant high school girl than a bad-ass dude. The movie relied more on star power than story power. Hokey, trite, stupid don't even begin to describe this piece of pasture patties. I want my money back!
Avoid this one like a rabid dog!
Luke Saucier 12/13/2010
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